Sharing YOga - my journey
Over the years, I've felt called to speak on cultural appropriation, as it's obviously a topic that effects my work in many ways. In the past I have talked openly about my personal journey - from complete contraction to being OK with sharing Yoga, Mythology and Philosophy from India and stories from around the world. Now, finally, the collective spotlight is finally shining on colonialism, imperialism and systemic racism, I feel called to take a somewhat messy leadership role to hold space for Yoga Teachers and practitioners who want to respectfully honour the roots of Yoga and create inclusive and safe places for all people.
The following is my own journey, and towards the end of this manual are some ideas for our group learning circle. My aim is to acknowledge these issues, take responsibility for my standing and, to always be respectful. Although it feels easier at times to say nothing, I'm willing to stand in any discomfort and keep the conversation flowing. I believe this conversation is hugely significant, and part of the healing we are being collectively called to right now.
Before I go further, I would like to acknowledge that this is being written on traditional lands of the Boonwurrung and Bunerong people. I recognise their strength, resilience and capacity, and the injustice that they, and all the Indigenous peoples of Australia have endured and are still enduring.
For the purposes of this piece of writing, and for the course in general, I am speaking only on the Yoga and Mythology that I share in my work, however, throughout the course we will be holding space for sitting in the discomfort of accepting racial injustice and, more specifically, the challenges of being a white Australian trying to actively embrace reconciliation. This is my story/identity, and, I imagine this is a shared identity for many within our group. It can, of course, be adjusted for those identifying differently so that everyone is included from where they sit in the discussion.
Throughout the course we will cultivate space to understand how we might honour the roots of Yoga, and how to respectfully practice Cultural Appreciation. To do this we will have to look at the uncomfortable truths of Colonialism, Imperialism, Privilege, Discrimination and racism. I don’t claim to have answers, but I am willing to sit in the fire, with the questions.
I have been practicing cultural-mindfulness (with a shifting and expanding awareness) for the past 15 years in my journey as a Yoga Teacher, ever since I sat at the feet of my Swami in a traditional Ashram in Tiruvannamalai , South India. I was then, as I am now, acutely aware of my white-ness, the ultimate strangeness of my situation. I spoke up about it. Swamiji's simple answer then, with a playful laugh at the “silliness” of my question, was this: Yoga is union.
This answer takes us directly to the centre, however, unfortunately, might be responsible for bypassing the journey to truly embodying the realisation of this union. Quite simply, if it were really true that your Yoga practice was cultivating a spiritual one-ness, wouldn’t that one-ness be including every-one?
Although Yoga takes its roots in the Indus Valley Civilisation, it has very much grown and expanded from India, and therefore associated with Hinduism. The path of Yoga, as taught to me, is one of awakening to our true natures as individuals, in order to awaken to the true nature of the Universe. Although there are some lineages and texts that are shrouded in secrecy, the Yoga that was brought to the West 130 years ago is a practice of Spirituality that is open to everyone, regardless of race, gender, sexuality, education, class, ability, or cultural background. It is, in fact, deep in the essential teaching of Yoga that we break down these barriers that separate us. This, however, doesn't mean that we can just go about claiming and profiteering from rituals, prayers, images and ceremonies. The integrity of Yoga must be sustained for any of that to be any more than lip service. In my path of dedicated service, I love to share Yoga, and so, I am always doing my best to be anchored in the integrity at the heart of this service, diving deep into the philosophy and ethics, beyond the body-beautiful-big-business that it has sadly become.
My love of philosophy brought me to mythology – and I met the Goddess as a call to reclaim my feminine power and wisdom. It is no accident that so many others are feeling a similar calling around the globe. The Goddess is rising now because we are in crisis. We have been asleep, forgotten our inherent connection to the Earth. This separation and dis-ease is felt on every level - from global politics to the health of our own bodies, and especially the health of our planet. The Goddess is rising as a force, an energy that moves through us all, if we are open and willing, regardless of backgrounds. This is a primordial energy, ancient as time itself. If the words ‘Goddess’, or ‘feminine’, seem outdated, cause offence or don’t resonate with you, please, call this energy 'nature'. In our modern setting these words can get tangled up and become a hindrance. In the bigger picture, these words represent:
the power of nature, its life force energy: that which seeks to
activate the cycle of birth and death.
And, as a force within life: that which sustains, nurtures,
protects and heals.
It has been my journey with the Goddess, more than anything else, that has woken me up. The stories are ancient and yet timeless, however, incredibly apt for the present, almost as though they were designed for our time. When I hear the mythology of Ancient Greece, Egypt, Sumer, and Indus Valley civilisations, I feel deep resonance, a remembrance. Admittedly, as a modern woman it took me a while to get through some deep resistance, but the calling was persistent. Possibly this resistance is an important piece in the story of just how deep I had to get inside of myself to understand the resonance - like a red-hot ember burning in the darkness. I imagine that you are reading this too because you recognise this sense of yearning - perhaps you also have resistance. After all, returning to the altar of wholeness might mean shaking the structures of everything you have ever believed in. To give it all up would be to give up our perceived safety, along with everything we’ve worked so hard to achieve and accumulate. In this time of Trump, robotic bloodshed and rapid climate change, we are reaching a collective dark night of the soul. The capitalism that has replaced connection is etched into the fabric of everything, and our sick and spiritually starved civilisation is sinking, again. From the wisdom of the feminine, from nature, we know that it is only from that deepest darkness of winter that the new cycle can begin. And this time, the invitation is to remember who we are - that we are made of this Earth’s life force energy, that we are not separate from it, and we are nor separate from each other. This is a cycle of great pain, because we are birthing something enormous, and it cannot be done without moving through the fires of transformation. We do it together, by doing the work within ourselves.
Learning the old stories and practicing Yoga, Pranayama, and Meditation have helped me to embody this reclamation of myself, not simply to connect back to the Earth and the nature of this life force, but to realise that we are the Earth, nature, life force - how can we possible connect to something that we already are?
My cultural heritage is (mainly) English, Maori, Scottish and French, and I am always on the hunt for stories that resonate from these places. I will never stop my searching for that deep connection on the physical, ancestral plane. I have sat long hours, to find peace in telling the stories of India, Tibet, Greece, Egypt and Sumer. I want to acknowledge here that my bloodlines do not claim these stories, and even if there is a part of me that wishes that they did, I wouldn’t be able to choose just one place or time - I love them all too much! My passion has become a study of theology, of spiritual code through story, paired with the transformational practices of Pranayama, Mantra and Meditation. I take on the responsibility of this work, by sharing with as much integrity, authenticity, research and respect as I can, as well as always giving more than I receive. My intention is to share something that connects us to ourselves, and never to claim it for ourselves.
Through this work, I feel held on this Earth, anchored in time and space.
Through this work, I begin to awaken and remember my true power, and the intricate web to which I am a part.
I am deeply privileged to have learned a very traditional method of Pranayama intensively with Master Teacher Venu Gopala Mueck in India. The practice itself was (and still is!) life changing, on every level. I learned all kinds of other Yoga related things at the Ashram too (of course!), but it has always been the Pranayama that I credit as the most powerful and expansive practice. My personal experience was intensive, immersive, and steeped in ancient tradition - I was living it, 100%, in India. For this reason, I found it practically impossible to integrate the teachings (beyond the basics), once I was back home. I was bursting to share this powerful practice, for others to have the benefits, and I had no idea how that could be done. It has taken me more than 15 years of teaching and continued practice, to come to a place where I feel not only comfortable to teach Pranayama, but also empowered to.
It has been a journey of claiming authority: The authority to adapt the practice to suit my own needs, in this female body, and in the Western, modern setting.
The second part of the journey has been reclaiming the authority to teach, both what I have learned directly, and the integrated adaptations I have made along the way. This is no small thing - and I have overcome much self-doubt to reclaim the authority and agency to create these courses, and take a strong stand for what (I believe) is an accessible and powerful practice, that gives respect and reverence to the more strict and rigid tradition that I learned. I rest in the knowledge that these practices have been adapted to suit the current times, by countless Teachers, for thousands of years. In this way it is living, breathing, and constantly evolving. This course, and this practice, is just a particle in the momentum of evolution. It comes from a truth that I know deep in my own body, from dedicated and committed practice, and I share it with you in service to that truth.
Traditionally, Pranayama – and Yoga generally – has been taught by men, to men, and the assumed expectation is that the Yogic lifestyle is supporting the practices - everything from diet to Spiritual ritual. Today, in the West, the popularity of Yoga (especially asana and meditation) has grown and spread like wild fire, especially with women, and the lifestyle is (more often than not), unlikely to be complimenting the practice in the “traditional” sense.
For this reason, amongst others, the integration of Pranayama has not been as easy or applicable in the West, it’s simply too powerful.
After 25 years of committed practice, and 20 years of teaching, I feel confident to share in this way, anchored in my experience and study, and with full understanding of the power of this practice.
This is a time of deep collective transformation, and I believe that this breath work and philosophy can support deep personal evolution. Any part of me that has previously been held back for fear of not getting it “right”, or offending someone, has been left to the side. I am willing to not get it perfect, to make mistakes, and to own any offence I might cause along the way. This is a huge time of change, it’s ok that we don’t have the answers - it’s ok that it’s messy.
On a personal level, I am reclaiming something from deep within my own self, something that is shared, a Universal truth. And, as this wholeness expands beyond my edges, I feel a deep connection to everything - quite simply the bliss of non-duality. The work hits me so deeply I’m in awe, and just so grateful for the ancient wisdom of Yoga. In sharing the work, I don’t claim it as my own, but rather in the hope that my personal interpretation of this ancient wisdom will find its way to the embers of your yearning and support your individual awakening journey.
My hope is that these whisperings can fan the flames of transformation - burning away any illusions of separation that hold us back from the exquisite bliss and pain of this precious life.
In this awakening process we must take full responsibility for our own privilege, in all its forms. We have the choice now to be part of a huge collective transformational process, passing through equality and equity, all the way through to justice and liberation. It is big work, and it certainly isn’t easy. But I can promise that the process towards the heart of truth is always worth it, and, that it is always made infinitely more easy if we can open our hearts and do it together. Lean in to this precious community.
My prayer is for the realisation of Unity Consciousness,
I will use my privilege in its service.